Love, Eggtually
by good-for-nothing-stories
Summary: Who would've thought that egging some random person's house would make Harry meet a cute guy, whom he'll soon meet eggain and fall in love with? AU. All muggles. Probably slightly OOC. Eggspect more puns.


**A/N: So this is the first chapter to my very first fanfic here. Please don't be too harsh on me, like I said on my profile, English is not my native language. Plus I might be mixing up American and British stuff, so please ignore that. I'm sorry if you think they're too OOC. I'm just getting into this.**

 **Disclaimer: All rights go to J. K. Rowling.**

Chapter One: _Whose house are we egging exactly?_

"Can you believe it?!", Harry exclaimed, fuming, as he strode over to his two best friends who stood in front of a row of lockers. Some people in the hallway gave him funny looks, but he was too angry to care. Ron, who had just been putting his books away, shot him a knowing look as he saw the crumpled-up paper Harry was tightly clutching in his hand. Harry slammed Ron's locker shut and pressed his papers against its door.

"Hey!", the redhead complained, but nevertheless stared at the big, fat, red "F" that was smeared all across the top sheet.

"Can you believe it?", Harry repeated, still sounding angry. "I spent weeks on this assignment! I've been to the library more often than before in my entire life!" Hermione, who stood to Ron's right side, took the papers from Harry and studied them.

"Blimey, Harry, why do you always get "F"s? Even I manage to keep up my "D"s in chemistry!", Ron commented after opening his locker again. Her eyes still on the paper, Hermione replied, "That's because you're in Slughorn's class. He doesn't want any students to fail chemistry."

Harry nodded in agreement. "Snape, on the other hand, hates me. He'd love to see me fail his class." He sighed.

"You really should show this to Mr Slughorn and ask him if he thinks you got graded unfairly.", Hermione advised Harry as she handed back the papers to him.

"It's worth a try", he agreed. "But guess what? I'm supposed to meet Snape in his office tomorrow after school and he'll give me a new assignment so I can somehow save my grade from ending up being an "F"!" Harry was fuming again. Aggressively, he stuffed the papers into his backpack. "Wait till I tell Sirius about this!"

Hermione frowned. "Do you really think you should tell your godfather about this? You'll just get another trip to the headmaster's office without any result except for letting Snape know that he's managed to piss you off again.", she stated.

Harry sighed. "It's just so unfair!", he yelled and slammed his fist against the locker next to Ron's. The redhead jumped at the noise.

"Bloody hell, calm down!", he demanded. Harry shot him an unnerved look.

"And what do you suggest I should do?", Harry snapped, running a hand through his messy black hair. Ron finally closed his locker and put on his backpack.

"Heck, just get yourself a dozen eggs and egg some random person's house. That's what my brothers did with me when I was totally infuriated, like you are right now.", he suggested and shrugged his shoulders.

"You can't tell Harry to do such a thing! I bet that's even illegal!", Hermione exclaimed and hit Ron's arm. Ron shot her a confused look and rubbed the spot she hit.

"Why not? He won't harm anyone!", Ron argued back. Hermione shook her head in disbelief.

"I can't believe I'm dating a moron like you.", she stated. Ron just grinned cheekily and kissed her on the forehead. Harry rolled his eyes at them.

"Guys, I gotta go. Got a bus to catch", he stated plainly before turning to leave. "I guess you're both quite occupied this afternoon.", he called back.

Hermione called after her best friend, "Don't do anything stupid like egging someone's house!" Next to her, Ron shook his head and took her hand. "When did he ever listen to you when it comes to being reckless?"

Later, at home, Harry still hadn't calmed down. He took the chemistry paper out of his bag and threw it into the trash. No need to show it to Mr Slughorn like Hermione had suggested. Mr Snape still wouldn't change his grade to a better one. It would only earn him another sneer from his crooked-nosed teacher and a lecture about life not being fair. Harry knew this too well by now.

Instead, Harry went over what Ron had said in his head. Maybe he really should go out and just egg someone's house - his godfather definitely wouldn't chide him for doing it. Sirius had told him lots of stories which contained him doing similar stuff in his childhood.

Sighing, Harry got up and strode into the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he saw the eggs laying there and tempting him.

"Whatever. I won't harm anyone.", he reassured himself, grabbed the box left the house.

Outside on the street, his confidence faltered. This was a stupid idea. Whose house should he throw eggs at? None of the neighbours' houses, they would definitely know it was him.

Then Harry's eyes lit up with mischief. There was a house at the end of the street which belonged to the Zabinis, a family almost everyone in town despised.

"Nobody'll hate me for dirtying their house", Harry said to himself and chuckled at the thought of his other neighbours, like old Mrs Figg, joining him.

With newly gained confidence, he quickly made his way over to the big mansion, which was surrounded by a tall iron fence on all four sides.

Before he could change his mind, he took an egg out of the box, closed his eyes and hurled it over the fence. When he heard a short _splash,_ he checked and realized that he had managed to hit a window, which now had egg yolk running down its length. Harry laughed out loud. _Ron was right,_ he thought, _this really makes you feel better._

Quickly, he grabbed another egg and was just about to throw it when a boy about his age with white blond hair rounded the corner. As the egg hit the wall next to the window that was already stained, someone spoke up to Harry's left side.

"What in hell do you think you're doing?" It was the strange kid. He gave Harry a dismissing look. Harry returned his stare with an equally cool glance.

"Egging this house, apparently", he answered.

"And why, if I may ask?", the boy continued to inquire. Harry sighed.

"Look, why don't you just let me be and go on with what you were doing? It's not as if I was throwing stuff at your house.", Harry snapped, being annoyed. Then realisation dawned on him. "It's not your house, is it?"

The kid rolled his eyes. "Of course not. As if I lived in such a neighbourhood." After a while of silence, he asked again, "Why are you egging the house?"

Harry sighed again and gave up on throwing the new egg he had taken out of the box.

"Bloody hell, I'm was trying to let my anger out. And you're just making me angry all over again!", Harry exclaimed. The new arriver laughed shortly at this and crossed his arms. There was silence again, during which the boys eyed each other. Finally, the blonde spoke up.

"Mind if I join you?", he asked and gestured towards the box.

"Do as you please", Harry replied and handed him an egg. With suddenly rising anger, the other boy threw it over the fence, making it hit the roof and splatter. Harry shrugged and threw an egg himself, which hit the letter box. A green letter box with simple silver letters spelling out _Parkinson_. Harry froze and turned to the boy next to him, who in the meantime had thrown another egg and hit the front door.

"Whose... whose house are we egging exactly? It's not the Zabini mansion, is it?", he asked, looking confused.

The blonde guy gave him a weird glance.

"That's the Parkinson's place. My ex lives here. That's why I joined you.", he answered.

"Oh shoot", Harry cursed. He turned to the other side of the street where a black letter box read _Zabini._

The unknown boy followed his gaze and laughed out loud.

"You got the wrong house, didn't you?"

Harry nodded, an uneasy feeling in his stomach. The other one still laughed.

Just then, a silver Mercedes pulled up in front of the Parkinson mansion. A well-dressed lady got out and had to stifle a scream as she saw the eggs. Furiously, she spun around and pointed a finger at the boys.

"YOU! YOU CLEAN UP THIS MESS! THIS INSTANT!", she yelled.

Harry reacted instantly. He dropped the box of eggs and shoved his accomplice away from the lady.

"Run!", he commanded, before taking off himself.

They didn't stop to run until they were lost in the maze of little alleys and sure no one was following them. Still panting, they started to grin at each other.

"Now I definitely feel better", Harry stated. Nodding, the blonde guy agreed. Then he looked down at his watch in shock.

"I really gotta go. I got to be home soon.", he excused himself before turning to jog away again.

"Wait!", Harry yelled after him. The runaway stopped in his tracks and turned around again.

"I don't even know your name! Mine's Harry, by the way."

The boy looked a bit unsure, then sighed. Before he ran away again, he told Harry his name:

"I'm Draco!"

 **A/N: Hope you enjoyed the first chapter. If you did, let me know and I'll try to upload regularly, like once a week.**


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